Un conditional Love

Me; “I never expected you to love me.

Less so, that you would love me unconditionaly.

I didn’t, in my wildest imagination,

not for one second think,

that you would show up.

For me!

Yet, here you are.

Your face!

Your eyes!

Your body!

It is as if,

all the partikles in your exsistence,

are made out of light.

You glow!

Waves of your love,

Engulfs me absolute.

You love me!”

You; “You knew that I would show up.

You called for me and you meant it.

Whenever anyone calls for me,

I will come.

That was not an empty promise.”

Me; “I am sorry.

Truly.

Forgive me, but I don´t have the gift of trust or intellect.

I think that I was just playing.

You know, when a child plays a game, secretly wishing it is real.

When I was my mothers and my fathers child,

I called out from love.

They did not respond.

It was as if, the warmth of life itself,

was not there.

They must have forgotten about you.

It confused me.

Then I called for you.

Out of love.

I called for you.

Not knowing what I did.

A spontaneous and selfish act, of a, not fully grown human being.

Since you turned up,

I have always wondered;

How is it possibel to love,

when one,

have not been loved oneself?

Before you came,

I didn’t know.

I knew the Word and I thought, that I knew the feeling.”

You; “Ahh! The unloved ones.

You are everywere,

but espescially here.

Looking for what you think, you have lost.

Feeling ashamed.

Trying to hide from the world and me.

Mostly hiding from yourself.

Thinking you are the lost ones.

The ache in your hearts,

The cold in your bones,

And the hunger in your belly,

will not leave you alone,

until you have found,

what you are looking for.

You think you special.

I am not saying this to be cruel.

I am cruelty itself.

And don´t think,

that it is compasion,

disquised as hate.

Hate, is when the abiture of perception, is closed.

I am compassion.

You have wondered,

how it is possibel,

to love,

when you have not been loved.

Allow me; “Would love, look for itself?”

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